(RP) Upset. Really Upset

I cannot help but to get upset because Jungsoo is so hard-headed like, can’t he actually push his schedules back until September or October? Must he really go to work immediately? It has only been two weeks. He needed three months to completely recover and recuperate, yet, he chose to push through. He always tries to keep the pain from us. He keeps on promising that he is going to take care of his body. Everytime he gets sick, he always tries to apologize and say the same thing yet he keeps on pushing himself to the limits. At what cost?

He needs to apologize not only because he keeps on making people worry about him but also he always ignores and hides the pain that he has been feeling. How long was he feeling that? A year? Damn bro. It has been a freaking year. I have always known that gall bladder stones can be treated but he ignored them.

He learned to be dependent and to stand on his own. There is nothing wrong with that but I hope he would listen for once.

I miss him but I do not want to see him not yet fully recovered. I’d rather die not seeing him for several months than to completely lose him because of his hard-headedness.


I just wish he takes care of himself. I mean, for real.


(MOD POST) Happy Birthday Park Jungsoo! @special1004

Dear Jungsoo,

I know you won’t be able to read this, but I’ll still take my chances. Happy 35th birthday to you! I emphasized your age because I wanted you to know that it’s my birthdate. LOL!

Sorry for the lack of preparation because I’ve been busy these past few weeks, but never did I forget about writing you a letter for your birthday. Last year, do you remember that I wrote and composed a song for you? I know that you were not able to listen to it but still, I am proud because it’s my first ever composition. You must be so proud. And one day, you’ll be able to hear it. This year, well, I’m writing a long letter because it’s how we like it, right? Hehe. I wasn’t able to prepare a lot for this year; things happened, but it’s the thought that counts, right?

How do I start this? Hmm… I don’t really know how to begin. My mind is blank as of this moment, but I know in my heart that I have a lot of things to say to you. I think, the first one is that… I want to thank you for the inspiration for the past eight years. I must admit that you are not the most perfect person on the planet, and I even bash you at times (jokingly, of course), but I don’t know… it’s just that I am so infatuated with you. I just love you for who you are. I disliked the mistakes that you did in the past, the tweet that you erased which was really, really painful, you know? It’s the first tweet that I’ve ever cried my heart out. Haha! And the things that you said that really hurt me and other fans as well. But guess what – I still love you. I do think that you poisoned me with your charms, whatever your charms are. I do think that it’s about your sincerity, your honesty and your passion that made me stay by your side all these years.

I thank you for being the leader of Super Junior. A friend to each member. I believe that you’re friends with all of them. Yes, you’re close with other members more, but I really believe your heart is with all of them. You may disagree with them at times, or even have conflicts, petty or deep, but you still love them. If not, would you still be a Super Junior member? Would you be a Super Junior leader? You could be an emcee and/or a host, because you’re best at that. You’re not the best singer nor dancer in the group yet you chose to be Super Junior. It’s one of your admirable traits – the reason why I fell for you in the first place. The reason that made me say that – this is my favorite person – my ultimate bias, my love, my ideal person, my heart, my soul, my sky. I thank you for being so strong for the group despite of the obstacles that you are facing right now.

I know that you’re also doubting yourself, or doubting about things in general. It happens, and I do not blame you for that. I know at times that you don’t want to continue, that you want to give up on some things. Thank you for making sacrifices – even if it was not for your own happiness. Sometimes I wish that you just take that path and no matter what decisions you’ll make, no matter what you want to do, no matter what you think, I will forever support you.

When you were in the army, you’ve been through a lot. I didn’t initially want to mention this, but I want to prove one point that I am also thankful for. I don’t know, and I will never know how much you suffered that time. I don’t know why also, but I have an idea. I will never know your feelings. I will never know what you think. I will never probably experience your grief. It was the perfect way to give up, for some – but I sincerely thank you for not giving up. Not giving up on life is your best gift to me. I can’t promise that I will be physically there – God knows I want to, but we’re star-crossed. We’re friends, virtual friends – and you don’t know me. But I want to protect you. I won’t say that I will protect you no matter what it takes – I can’t do that. But I promise you that I’ll protect you in any way that I can. It’s my payback for you not giving up on life.

I have a lots of things to thank you for, but I cannot tell everything at once – so I just want to say thank you for everything.

I also have a lot of things to say sorry to you. You were not my first favorite member in Super Junior, but you remained the longest. You like loyal people, right? Hehe! I don’t know if I am still considered loyal after liking other groups aside from Super Junior, despite of the fact that I promised you that I won’t love anyone else but you and Super Junior. I am sorry for that. I am sorry for holding you back. I am a fan and I know that being one of your fans, even if you don’t know me at all, I am still one of the reasons why you’re holding something back.

I also wish for you to become healthy always. You’ve been overworking yourself, and I know that you are a workaholic who works even during vacation. If that’s what you happy then I’ll support you for that, but please take care of yourself. Take care of your health. I don’t know what I’ll do if you do not take care of yourself or if anything bad happens to you. I know fans and friends and loved ones won’t like it too.

Do not change just because people want you to change. Please change only if you want to change – change positively for yourself. I don’t honestly care if you’re different from Leeteuk – the man in front of the camera, the man in front of the fans, the leader of Super Junior. People love you for who you are. Do not doubt about that.

Please do not take what the haters say to heart. We are your barriers so just look at us. Do not look outside your barriers. We are your friends, your family. We got your back, your front and your side.

All I really want is your happiness. You cannot always be happy, but I wish you to be happy most of the time. Whatever things would make you happy – I’m for it.

Lastly, I wish that you remain the same person with so many dreams and with a strong will to achieve those dreams, the person who works hard to achieve those dreams.

It’s kind of funny, because I still don’t know how I feel about you because it’s been so long. At times I do think that I love you as a person, and as a man, but I don’t think it’s the case because as I mentioned before, maybe I was just in love with Leeteuk, and not Jungsoo – your true self. But whether you are Leeteuk or Jungsoo, or whatever people call you, I still love you for you. I will continue to do so. I will continue to hold your hand and never let go because even if people come, it’s still you.

Again, happy birthday to you! Hope you have a great day, the best leader, my ultimate crush, my Sky, Park Jungsoo! I love you very much.

(RP) 6 Years of Love

It has been six years (and 3 days, actually) since I became a Jungsoo biased ELF.

There have been many ups and downs, many happiness, sadness, anger, excitement and other roller coaster feelings as I stan Leeteuk. I have confessed my love for him so many times even though it won’t be reciprocated. I even declared that he was not my bias anymore during those six years. But no matter what, no matter how many KPOP groups and members came, it is still Leeteuk. 🙂

Dear Jungsoo,

I will go on and never let go of your hand until you ask me to.

I love you! 😘

(MOD POST) Happy Birthday Leeteuk!

So… this is so late… because only 1 hour left and it’s already July 2 – meaning, Leeteuk’s special day is finally over. Don’t worry, I have reasons. Hihi. You’ll know later.

Anyway… as usual, I would want to wish Park Jungsoo a happy birthday. I know that he is not home to celebrate with his loved ones but I hope that he has a wonderful day today.

Actually, there isn’t any tear-jerking birthday message for him today. Sorry. T-T

I’m joking.

Of course, Leeteuk is my most favorite, most special, most loved person (after my family of course) in the whole wide world. Woo. Kiligin ka.

I know that I have been busy spazzing with Leo lately, but then I know that he knows (of course he really doesn’t) that 100% percent of my heart belongs to him. I have another heart for others though. HAHAHAHA just joking.

I don’t have a lengthy message for him (I actually do, but maybe I’ll write it soon). BBBBBBut!

I have two gifts for him.

I composed a song for him. Hehe. I planned this last time too, but it’s too difficult! T-T

It’s more than a minute long and it’s acapella (because I have a hard time composing it using the piano, I’ve tried a lot of melodies but I failed). I still failed, however, because I basically did adlibs only that was why my voice was shaky and sometimes flat (sorry about that). I put the lyrics in the video too. Also, I apologize if I would cause a thunderstorm for this.

This song sounds like a musical piece because it’s so random. Yeah, I’m sorry if I failed big time. And sorry if it’s not Korean. HAHAHA Maybe next time when I finally learn how to speak the language.

Hehe. Here it is… Please don’t laugh!

A Promise

And my second gift… is a sketch of him. I apologize again if the drawing doesn’t look like him. Hehe. Will improve next time. I hope.

Will post this later maybe on Saturday. Hoho. I am not yet finished. XD

Park Jungsoo, thank you for being born. Thank you for being you. Biglang ganun. It’s only a month left and we’ll finally see you back with Super Junior again. I sincerely missed you and your craziness, your dorkiness, your mistakes, your insecurities, your emo-ness, etc. But I also missed your voice, your moves, your laugh, your dimples, your smile, your eyes, your piano skills, your emcee skills, your talents, your dedication, your strength, your leadership and everything about you. This is another chapter of your life because another year has been added. No, you’re not old. You just aged a little bit, so don’t be insecure about it. Everyone grows old, everyone ages. And be proud because you are mature now. Be proud because you are loved by everyone (well, there are still haters but I bet haters also miss you and they secretly love you).

Don’t get too sad if there are ELF who finally left the fandom (you might say that I left the fandom because of the VIXX spazzing, but the truth is, I didn’t, don’t and won’t leave this fandom. I won’t leave you. I promised to hold your hand and not let go forever, right?). I won’t say they are not true ELF because I know, deep inside their hearts that there is still, even slight, a Super Junior part. It’s not about the people who left, it’s about the people who stayed.

Just be happy with your life. I wish you all the success in life (you are almost there, just find someone you would marry haha). Just be yourself. Positive, negative – it’s what you are. It’s who you are. It’s what makes you Leeteuk – the only one in the world. The only one in my heart. Naks.

Oh wait, before I forget, I would ratify my promise. I will hold your hand and never let go unless there is someone else you like to hold your hand for the rest of your life – someone else you would love and be with for the rest of eternity. I won’t be selfish when that time comes. And I won’t cry, don’t worry. I’ll be sad for myself, yes, but I won’t cry because it’s your happiness. XD Why did I even say it here?


Happy birthday Leeteuk, my Angel Hair Pasta, my Itik, my ChopinTeuk, my RattaTeukie, my Immortal Soul, my Fantasy, my Jungsoonim.

I love you, and I will always love you.

Ugh I am so cheesy, I feel so weird when I say ‘my’. I know you’re not mine, but still… HAHAHA

(MOD POST) Stay Strong Park Jungsoo

I went home, knowing that Jungsoo’s father and grandparents died in a car accident. I felt blank. I was very sad for Leeteuk who lost three most important people in his life in just a snap. Losing one is sad enough, what more if it is three? I cried, and wished I was with him to comfort him.

Earlier, when I was on my way home, I suddenly felt the urge to visit him in Korea for no definite reason. I just felt that I wanted to go to him and hug him for no reason at all. I didn’t know why, but I felt that I needed to go there.

I thought that I was just missing him, but… it was something else.

Condolences to Jungsoo and his family. I hope they can mourn in private.

Jungsoo, I want to say sorry… because I could not be there with you now that you’re in one of the darkest hours of your life, but I just want you to know that even if we’re apart, I am still holding your hand and I won’t let go of it, especially now. You were grateful to your father and grandparents, and I know, even if they are all in heaven now, they are still going to watch you and they are so proud of you, because you are one of a kind, their special angel. Super Junior members, other artists, ELF and other fandoms are protecting you and we all love you so please stay strong.

#StayStrongParkJungsoo. We will pray for you and your family.

(MOD POST) Happy Birthday Leeteuk!

Happy birthday to my one and only love, Park Jungsoo, also known as Leeteuk! How are you now? I hope you are doing fine and you are still healthy.

It has been 242 days – or not, if I lost count. To be honest, I didn’t miss you everyday, though there would be days I would miss you like crazy. I actually watched your interviews and snippets of your musical, and I was, and up until now, I am still proud of you. Even though you are not in the limelight anymore, even though you are just that Park Jungsoo who does his best to serve your country in the army, you are still the same person that we, your fans, knew.  You might disagree because you think that Leeteuk and Park Jungsoo are completely opposites but I think your similarities are quite visible. ^^ Anyway, I saw you once in an interview, you were not smiling. I just hope you would. :”) Don’t worry, dude, kuya (brother), you are still a great entertainer! So you have to cheer up. That person still loves you~

You know, I still cry whenever I listen to Only U. I still cry whenever I hear you sing. You may not be the best singer, the best dancer, the best actor, you are definitely the best person for most people. Believe me. You always put us to tears whenever we see you, whenever people are misjudging you.

Some people hated you, disliked you and underestimated you even if you are serving the army… but you are slowly proving that you are worth the respect. As the obedient and loving son of your parents, as the caring and supportive brother to your sister,  as thevloyal and faithful friend to your friends, as the inspiration to your ELF, and as the best leader of Super Junior whose members follow your footsteps, you are worth everything. You are worth the love, respect and understanding of all people. I may not be someone who has known you personally, but I know, deep in my heart, that all of these traits are you. And I have loved you for these traits. Oops, cheesy,  but it is true.

And there is something I want to apologize for even if you are not directly affected. I really wished to celebrate your birthday in your homeland but I think I can’t. I am really regretting it. I was hoping to breathe the same air as you on July 1st. It sucked that I wasn’t able to keep that promise. Ugh.

To be honest, I was worrying about writing my birthday message to you. I was thinking how to celebrate your birthday now that our trip to Korea was canceled. Weird, because you won’t hear nor see nor read my message to you, but still… it is like celebrating the birthday of your favorite doll. Haha. I don’t know to express myself to you until now, because we are all saying same things to you. I am sorry about that~ I lack creativity. But here I am.

I know every fan has a special promise to you. And aside from waiting for you to come back (it is actually given). Waiting for you is one promise that I would not be able to break. And there is one more…

I will hold your hands and never let go.

There. I said it again.

Now for my birthday wish (I am sorry to those people reading this nonsense right now – I really like writing a novel for Jungsoonim).

Dear Park Jungsoo, you are 31 now. Hehe. Don’t feel offended if some people (including me) are calling you old or ahjussi or the similar terms. Haha. It doesn’t mean we are mocking your age. Sometimes, it is an endearment (I know you know it, too). I love you regardless of your age, Jungsoonim (yes, I came up with this nickname for you). I just wish for you to have more blessings in the future. Hardships and downfalls are still here, but use all the good things in your life to stand back on your feet. I also wish for you to have the best life you could have, to your family, to your friends, to your career, to your health, to your work and to the most crucial of all – your lovelife. I wish that the person that you found would say yes to you so that you can get married already. Not that I am (or we are) telling you to marry fast, but I think I am (or we are) ready to see you proposing to someone, walking the aisle, marrying that lucky person. Haha! What else… oh, and lastly, I just want you to be happy. 😀

This is it, I am done. Sorry for keeping this post long~ I just want to post this just in case he would read it in the future. Though impossible, let us just hope. Woohoo.

I love you, Jungsoonim.

See you later! 🙂
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Super Junior Full Discography

Hello guys! Yes I’m pretty bored, so I made a list of Super Junior full discography here. I actually copied from Wikipedia and other sources, and I also added some songs that are not mentioned.

For the Super Junior Super Show Tour Album category, I separated the live version audios to studio version audios. I provided playlist links for the live version audios.

I added YouTube links from various users so that you can listen to the songs. If you are going to take the videos out, please credit them. I will try to provide download links if I can, but I think it’s impossible because I might have a problem on copyright or something.

I will provide links for the lyrics if I can. 🙂

I know that it is too late to compile this but this is for the sake of the new fans or the other fans who want to listen to Super Junior songs. Of course, this is also for the sake of the current fans who miss listening to other songs of Super Junior.

If I have mistakes on the title or the links or anything, or if I missed some songs, kindly comment so that I can fix them. This will also be constantly updated, if anything comes. Thank you!

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(RP) Temporary Escape – For Leeteuk

Until now, I don’t have a definite farewell message for Leeteuk. Maybe because he’s not really saying goodbye but he is only saying a mere “see you again later”. If I say that this is a farewell message, it seems that he’s not coming back. Or… to be more realistic, I am not coming back and I will not wait.

Instead of posting purely about Teuk’s enlistment, I will have a confession to make first. Then I’ll write a brief message for Teuk.

Having this blog has been the best thing that ever happened to me (referring to the online world). I started writing (or to be specific, copying and pasting news and other information here). Then I learned to write my own insights regarding news or information, and my comments were written in Italics and sometimes, I was not writing at all if I did not have any comment.

I fell in love with blogging when I started posting about the boys’ cyworld updates and posts, and that was what I loved the most. I tried to comment after these cyworld posts and whatnot, and I felt like I was replying to everything even if it wasn’t even read. I just liked the fact that at least, I was able to comment or something.

I don’t remember whose cyworld update I blogged first, but I’ll be really honest. Because Leeteuk had been writing and updating A LOT in his cyworld, I got fond of posting his cyworld updates and commented in each and everyone of them. He’s the person who had the most number of updates. It was since July of 2009, I think.

It started from just commenting, then I realized that I was already replyimg directly to him, meaning, I was commenting using his name, as if I was really talking to him. Instead of using third person,  I used second person, referring to him. It felt like I was replying in his cyworld, but through my blog (that time I did not have any cyworld – I didn’t know how to make one). I grew attached to it, that I nearly forgot about my studies, although I’m not saying it’s all because of that. Then, that is when my feelings grew for Leeteuk. I mean, I liked it when he was almost everyday writing about random stuffs, cheesy lines,  emotional posts, all his feelings about his day and even criticisms. I was always looking forward to reply to every single update about his posts.

Then, it came to a point when I thought that he was replying to me.

I was silly then, because I thought that we were chatting using our blogs, even if I was the only ome referring to a specific person, and he was referring to general and unknown person. So that time, I became more and more addicted to comment, or reply to be more specific,  at the same time, I became more and more attached and “in love” with him. Instantly, he became my bias by then.

I started watching Sukira, searching every news about him – positive or negative. I lead to think of extreme things too.

Then came a moment when I thought of extreme things that made me more delusional. So I decided to temporarily quit blogging and focus on my studies.

But I still knew about Teuk’s updates… especially about his cyworld.

Then I came back after a term (three months). And when I blogged again, I asked if you (my readers) missed me.

And I got a reply the next day.

“There are times I miss you like crazy.”

My heart really exploded,  my feelings became unclear. Is that even possible? I tended to look on my fantasy too much, but I kept it all to myself because I wasn’t sure. I wanted to believe that it was for me and I wanted to believe that it was for another person.

But thanks to that post, I woke up from my dreams – coincidence. It’s just a coincidence. Everything was just my delusions. He’s too far that I began to see life with him as if I was with him for real. The bell rang in my mind. It was time to stop.

After new year (2010), I realized that Leeteuk seldomly updated his cyworld. I felt really sad about it. But on the lighter note, I thought that in that way, I would not be delusional anymore, thinking that we’re chatting, that he’s referring to me in every post that he made. I stopped posting about cyworld updates – I grew tired of it and of my delusional habit.

Yes, I stopped, to be honest. But the feeling was still there, it was still deep that I could not get up anymore.

Until now, to be honest. I am thinking, of all the people, why Leeteuk? Why did I ‘fall’ for him? Why to a celebrity? Why to someone who does not even know me?  Why to someone that I’ll not be able to talk with? Why to someone that is so far away?

It hurts… that I need to live with my fantasies. Now, I know the difference between possible and impossible. What I imagined about him and me will NEVER be real. It’s just a false thinking.

I told myself that I’ll be less involved. That I’ll return to where I started – just a fan. And fortunately, it happened. Not that I stopped loving SJ and Teuk, I still do, but as a plain fan with no delusions at all.

And now that he’s leaving the limelight for the army, he was farther than the usual. I am used to it. Although I told myself that I needed not be sad, I will still be, but not as deep as before. Maybe I will cry on the day itself because to be honest, even if he’s still outside the army,  I already miss him. He’s still my number 1 anyway.

Now… Teukie… But then… I won’t be sad after that. For two years that you’re not outside, I’ll be a better person and a cheerful one as well. Just like how you wanted yourself be. It’s just two years… I’ve been a Teuk biased for three years, so compared to two years, it is faster. I might have my life far away from delusions – sticking to my reality, but I’ll still wait for you to come back.  Just like what I promised before – I will hold your hand and never let go.

See you again later… my angel hair pasta.

Super Junior – Come To Play Cuts (MBC)

[120723] Talk about Receiving a real Golden Disk from Chinese Fans

[120723] Super Junior Songs Remix

[120723] Eunhyuk Dancing

[120723] Talk about Stage Performance

[120723] Shindong and Eunhyuk Dancing Cut

Credit: oniongring, simhy

Super Junior – 6Jib Photocard Message Translations

Here are the boys’ photo card messages:











Very thanks to everyone gave us lots support, will show more good appearance to you, stay together

Credits: @TaiwanLuvSJ, chokyuhyunbar


I will post their “Thanks to” translations tomorrow, I hope. ♥