(RP) Regrets


Here is a fact to help you if you want to move on.

Sometimes, there is that one person whom you need so that you can fully recover. Don’t just rely to that other person who broke your heart. It is more likely to happen that that person who broke your heart is not the right one for you.

***

She was living like a fool for a year and a quarter. She couldn’t deny the feeling that she got happy when he answered her messages indirectly. Well, she was not sure if he was directly answering her messages for her. But that’s what she was feeling. No… She is feeling that he still is answering until now. She can’t help but to feel happy and of course special.

It was a mere coincidence. That was what she thought. But something was telling her that it was true. So she continued hoping. And hoping. She tried not to be tired of it.

She would always laugh at the people who thought that that person was theirs. Because she secretly thought that she was the girl he was being depressed about. That she was the one whom that person was in love with. She wanted to tell everyone about that, but she was afraid that she would be laughed at and of course, she would be hoping until the end.

Then she learned a truth about him. Although she had an idea… she became too reluctant. And pathetic of thinking that he might love someone else other than her. No one knew… well, some knew about that. Others just turned a blind eye and continued liking him. Others paid attention and kept an eye on him and her. Like this person.

She found out that he loves other person. He is willing to risk anything for this person. He even waited for her for such a long time. He was loyal to her even if the girl was not even loyal to him at all. She already proved that. And too bad, he cannot do it for her. He cannot… because he never pays attention to her.

She knew his girl, she liked her for him, because she could feel that she was the right one for him. But she thought wrongly. She didn’t want to judge her because they were not close to friends at all. And she just knew her character and what she was doing through a hearsay. She did not have any evidence at all but that rumored fact.

And her heart becomes tired. She’s scared that this day will come. She is scared that if she stops it, she’d regret this in the end. But she is also afraid of being hurt again.

To be honest, she felt that he would be sadder when he learned that someone stopped liking him. But as she can see, he is not sad at all. Maybe he just hides his true feelings for her, she thought. Now, she knows that he doesn’t really care for her at all. Even those moments when she first fell for this person. He never does care, so why in the world would he care about some tiny little thing?

And the sad thing she realized… she was not even different from those people who were claiming that he was theirs. She was an idiot for falling for someone she doesn’t even really know. She pities herself. She pities everyone else. She wants to escape from her fantasies and those lies behind them.

No one else knows if this thing will happen again. But one thing is for sure – she will never fall in love like before. She is afraid of regrets. She is afraid of everything now.

She doesn’t know if she will ever thank this person who makes her realize everything she needs to realize. Because somehow, she felt happiness liking that person from afar.

And now that she’s liking someone else… will he care?

No probably not.

***

Do you believe that the word count excluding this sentence is 666? Scary. -_- But don’t worry, it’s just coincidence… You are not cursed because of this. =))

Hindi mo naman ito mababasa hindi ba?

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